Intrusive Natures – A Gist of the Study of Human Nature

Lewis Caroll once said, “the things most people wan t to know about are usually none of their business.” I find this quote increasingly substantial as far as its nature is concerned. It is  true indeed  that we are all interested in other people’s matters when our own matters need utmost care.

While we never want or we never encourage people to make acquaintanceship with our dark secrets, we are as much equipped with all sorts of chisels, hammers and shovels to dig the dirt out of other people’s backyards in search of a potential skeleton that would satisfy our growing hunger for gossip and slander. There is a Nepali saying which roughly translated sums up to: One hardly notices a bull walking up on one’s back, while, one is extremely quick to notice even a lice crawling up others’ back. Such a disposition fired by exaggerated curiosity, however enthusiastic it may be, is recognised as a female attribute as being an overall accepted truth particularly in the eastern world culture. However, I find myself in a position to refute the above statement with great vehemence and thus with all my strength, abolish such connections that are attributed to either of the sexes.

As much as virtues such as beauty, kindness, patience and  forbearance are assigned to a female nature, vices such as gossip, slander, envy, prejudice etc are also ordained to the female sex leaving the male species overall neutral. My point of argument is to claim that there is and should be no attribute determined on the basis of sex. Men or Women, we are both humans and are equally equipped with virtues and vices that recognise us on a similar plane.

Coming back to “intrusive natures”.  As much as it seems to be the crux of human nature,  a picture of a nosy person (armed with an array of chisels, drills, crowbars and shovels), bent on digging his or her way into a friend’s misfortune, only for the sheer want of knowing what the friend is hiding, is not a welcoming picture. Some people make a living out of digging into people’s secret lives – why else would we have private investigator-ship or tabloid journalism ? Bringing a particular kind of crime to light by probing, is an entirely different thing. But, probing into other people’s lives, where you are not welcome is – although not a statutory violence – an offense nonetheless.

Therefore, as Caroll claims that the things we most want to know about is usually not our business, it is highly unappreciative to make it our business to excavate into other people’s guarded worlds. While we feed in other people’s misery, misfortune, we forget to acknowledge the degree of our own miserable selves. In the feverish pursuit of the knowledge of other people’s whereabouts, we sometimes bring our heads together in discussing people who are not even present, not realising, that it is the very same group of people who will be talking about us as soon as our backs are turned.

We are quick to point fingers and blame the others for our misfortune but we equally pretend not to notice those three fingers pointing back at us. It is  thus a matter of simple pondering, why we human beings are ridden with a curiosity of such magnitude, that we simply must know; that we simply must discuss the fall of a certain person and disparage the rise of another, when he or she is not even present amongst us. A disease, the contagion of which we cannot escape – an affliction that we all deny that we are a part of, yet cannot help lending our ears to that juicy bit of gossip floating about.

We are the biggest and the only existing walking contradiction. We make resolutions, only to break them a month or so apart. We make promises only to break them when we no longer feel its weight. We listen to others but we already have a preconceived notion at the back of our heads. We say we agree with what our friends or acquaintances say, but as soon as they turn their backs, we disagree. We say that we never gossip or slander, yet we are insinuators of biggest gossip that might destroy the reputation of someone we may know closely or remotely. We are as much smooth operators, as ones with the roughest and most insensitive edges.  We are our own worst enemy, for we destroy the likes of ourselves without even flinching, pretending to not have possessed the knowledge, that we have launched a trusted person’s downfall by simply spreading it.

Slander by Anonymous Americas.

Twas but a breath–
And yet the fair, good name was wilted;
And friends once fond grew cold and stilted,
And life was worse than death.

One venom-ed word,
That struck its coward, poisoned blow,
In craven whispers, hushed and low–
And yet the wide world heard.

‘Twas but one whisper–one,
That muttered low, for very shame,
The thing the slanderer dared not name–
And yet its work was done.

A hint so slight,
And yet so mighty in its power,
A human soul in one short hour
Lies crushed beneath its blight.

Images taken from

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Yoshay Lama

I welcome you warmly to my blog. This is the resting place of most of my creative work. This blog consists of book reviews, articles, poems, mere reflections and excerpts from my stories.

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